The Ballad of John Bullen

Twang!!!

I woke up this morning,

With a guitar in my hand.

I said I'm a gonna be playing

My blues throughout the land

And I'm a gonna play it

With my Blue Condition band.

I played a Strat on Sunday,

'Cos I was feeling blue.

I played my Les Paul on Monday

For something else to do.

My nose was blocked on Tuesday,

When I got the flu.

Played my Clapton records

On the day they were released,

I want more blues and feeling,

The punters will not be fleeced.

Like B.B. King plays Lucy,

Dominate the beast.

I got my ES330,

Just like 'The Face' did play.

And now I am the Blues Man

And that's how I'm gonna stay.

You may not even like me,

But the blues is just my way.

I played with Screamin' Lord Sutch

And jammed with Boney M,

I hear them useless boy bands

And spit on them with phlegm.

Was much better in my day

With Cream, And Slade, and Them.

(And Clapton!)

I walked out in the kitchen,

Hummed my twelve bar blues.

They gave me no recognition,

Even though I paid my dues.

But I'm still rock 'n' roll ready

To play just how I choose.

I think of all the bands

That I have been therein.

And the crap musicians

Who don't know where to begin.

It makes me feel so blue that

I want to hit the gin.

I once had a studio

Just south of Watford town.

Thought it would go somewhere,

But people let me down.

But I still got my blues

To stop a deep worn frown.

I may be getting older,

But the blues, it is still young.

Status Quo have sold out

Playing loads of dung.

I am the one true Blues Man

I'll never take a bung.

(Well, maybe.)

My Marshall is still humming,

Pumping out the watts,

My Gibson is so heavy,

My lead, it has no knots.

I'll play my blues with feeling,

On trains and planes and yachts.

I may be getting older

My hair may soon be gone.

But don't you call me Bonehead.

That is another song.

The blues will be eternal,

Even when I'm getting on.

Twang!!!

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